and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
