do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
