She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
