That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
