I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
