he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
They are going to name an STD after you.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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