fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
