I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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