She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize
