I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
