do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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