ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
3pm strippers are depressing
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Randomize
