We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
