The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
