I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
