what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I need to stop coming to work sober
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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