I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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