Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Randomize
