I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
