he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
