belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
