What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
