Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
