So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
do nipples grow back?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
