Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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