was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
