Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
