I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
