Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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