i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize