I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
