Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
