umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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