I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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