I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
