He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
My pussy is not your playground.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize
