I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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