it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize