You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
