I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
