We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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