i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Shame is for Republicans.
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