I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Drake has all the answers
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
