New invention idea: vibrating tampons
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
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