FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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