I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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