The brown eye won't let me do that either.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
