The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
did you just send me my own nude
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Randomize