I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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