have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
