if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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